To be where I am at this moment in life isn’t where I saw myself in 10 years or within the last five; things really change in a blink of an eye or look so different than anything you ever imagined.
Here I am
sitting in Louisiana with rain,booms of thunder that could knock a home off it’s foundations with flashes of lightening that exposes the trees making one feel your so deep in the swamps filled with gators and a three toothed witch with long skinny fingers a bent back with the aroma of jambalaya in her hair as she’s rattling and shaking the bones with the prospect of telling one’s future for those who believe of course in this method of fortune telling or any form of witchcraft. I come from Oklahoma where I know what to look for in tornado clouds and skies,the way the animals find shelter and watching their behavior warns one to find shelter as you prepare what may be needed but I’m not schooled in hurricane weather because these people in this the area of the world believe for some reason tornados are worse than hurricanes,they have no storm cellars or shelter to seek safety and being prepared in Louisiana is having a generator in the shop,a 5 gallon can of gas and all the beer or liquor you can drink with plenty of ice,the ice may or may not be hardened with salt to keep it from melting;and beer tastes good with salt right? I had lived in Louisiana since my late teens,seeing the behaviour of grabbing the ice chest full of drinks,the drink of choice people hitting the streets with chest in tow and hearing the famous last words of a fool,” Hold my beer and watch this.”
When first arriving in Louisiana I was certain the ice chest was an accessory to ones outfit as jewlery or a hat would be in other parts of the world. I have since learned it’s a convenient seat with drink in tow and is more valued than having reservations at a posh eatery.Yet one must be aware of their setting arrangements and who is the designated cooler watcher because there are those who comb the party sites waiting for the intoxicated to wonder away from their cooler/seat only to find someone has taken their setting arrangement and their drink leaving them no recourse but to either go home,buy more or wait until they find the next unsuspecting intoxicated person to high jack their chest of goodies,these were the pirates of the by gone times of my youth. It’s hilarious to know I came from Pennsylvania and Oklahoma to what seemed like uncharted territory of Louisiana where everything seemed so strange,sometimes uncivilized but the culture,history and the food were absolutely amazing. Living there I have learned to cook much of the crusine over the years and enjoy doing so but I also delight in making my sauce for pasta dishes as I learned from a Sicilian woman in Pennsylvania who barely spoke English, actually it was her daughter who taught me the art of making the most wonderful dishes known to the America’s 😁. I learned how to cook from my mother and grandmother from my daddy’s side of the family and cooking is my way of showing my love.. my soul food..for every part of me is put into every dish I create.
A PURPOSE AND A WAITING TIME
I’m trying to do as I’ve been shown knowing everything has been lined up for a purpose.Everything we’re called to do will start manifesting as doors to the area of more than enough to be able to set in order a home for displaced homemakers to find shelter and help on furthering their education or vocational skills and helping keep woman for a certain span of time for obtaining the GED,or further educational skills for fine tuning them for the ability to walk away form abuse to transitioning into the work place after years of being a homemaker, though they may have been running the finances, household,children and encouraging a husband who they thought was there to support them for all their times of sacrifice partnering in their relationship, friendship,partnership,a corporation between the two of them,then something went in a different direction for them causing the need for a place such as I desire to put into place.
The spirit speaks therefore I wait for Father God to bring everything to pass,for if He spoke it,it shall surely come.
Thy will be done,oh Lord
A Double Duty of resolving issues and relationships
I received a phone handed to me with , the words ” she’s not going to give in,you may as well listen to what she has to say.” As I followed the wisdom of a middle aged blue-eyed beauty whom I call my heart,my daughter,best friend,prayer partner,prayer warrior and more than a conqueror victorious mighty woman of God who loves me enough to walk with me patiently in love instead of a stern voice of reprove; as a son often times will if he’s bombarded by a controlling wife or mother as some men are.Which I’m proud to say I have not gotten into my son and daughter in laws marriage but I have shamefully but NOT a shamed that I have gotten right in there with my daughter’s relationship but it’s like a sister,more of a momma bear thang than a controlling thang in a relationship with them.
My children are also allowed to have a life. I prepared for this early in life when I spent more time listening to the saying rambling through my mind ;
the quote which says,” A son’s a son until he takes a wife, but a daughter‘s a daughter for the rest of her life.
In this true quote I was taught to be the mother in law I always wanted,one who stayed out of their marriage,who encouraged Tarnisha to take the postion of the wife, I would and will always support her and them in prayer for she became one with my son who is blood of my blood and bone of my bone.
Please pardon these ramblings in this moment as I’m trying to capture a thought in more detail than I’ve been able to since the going to Oklahoma and having Thelma aka momma picked up at the nursing home where she was but did not want to be,is now here in Mississippi after being in the hospital in Tulsa with her where it was believed she would not make it through the night,the first of seven nights we encountered there; Cheryl and I side by side,in unison of our strengths and weaknesses within each other able to trust with out hesitation pulling together to bring momma here to Brookhaven, Ms. to an atmosphere of unexpectancy but be maintained for her well – being, where she had a rebound of c-diff ; she is now cleared of,is gaining strength and weight at the facility Diversicare of Brookhaven where she is having everything in every area of her life taken care of at 83 years old. Father God is giving us the ability to heal any wounded areas in our relationship as we’re helping each other in area’s we cannot do anything but pray,be forgiving,compassionate and most of all being able to love without judgement, remembering people have done their best with their life decisions;they may have not been the proper choices but they have been made; right, wrong or indifferent yet made.There’s nothing we can say or do to change the course of life when the decisions have been made by the flesh, in the flesh and about the flesh; often we are not saved nor living in line with God’s word in our lives when these vital decision have been made,we not then realizing it is He who has all the wisdom,knowledge and understanding we need in every situation but by His grace He’s given a second chance for momma and I to build the relationship we are to now have.
C-diff has reared it’s ugly head again and momma is very ill,weak and in need of prayer. The antibiotic doesn’t seem to completely clear it,just keeping it at bay. We hear all clear but yet in time it’s hit once again. A fecal transplant has been mentioned in Oklahoma but has not been spoken of here and being unable to be at The hospital as I was in Oklahoma I am not able to speak to the doctors about the transplant 😔.
Change is coming ,in this I believe
The home life has changed a bit which brings hope,I saw a glimpse of the man I love yesterday, Thursday August 27,2020 as we sat enjoying lunch together at a local eatery,the atmosphere of men coming in for lunch talking about work and cutting up but comfortable,we enjoyed hamburger steak with onion gravy and fries with Texas toast,it was certainly more than we could eat but delicious all the same. We then ventured home where no alcohol was consumed where we spent time with each other on a more meaningful level and yes I felt like I was in a special place in heaven where I could see and feel what our relationship could and should be,WHAT I pray for everyday.
Only Father God knows what any of our futures holds so keep believing,keep encouraging yourself and most of all stay strong.
HAVE A BLESSED DAY 😘