The rainy season
An exceptionally warm winter
As winter is concerned here in Southwestern Mississippi,this year has been an ò medication,the rainy weather causes fibromyalgia and RA flares which feel more like the flu without being sick,causing the body to ache, hot swollen joints,even the hairs on my scream in pain. what !?!? My hair’s hurting as if it were being pulled by the roots.
The worst of this terrible infirmity called fibromyalgia is that it will be on going for a little minute because it’s starting into our rainy season,as if I need more of this hell,now I’m not complaining don’t get me wrong I’m just trying to get those who do not suffer from the three amigos Lupus,Fibromyalgia and Rheumatoid Arthritis to understand everyday is a chore during flare ups where even the least amount of activity drains one’s energy where naps are necessary to rest the relentless discomfort surging throughout entire body. I’m not looking forward to the next few weeks or so of on again off again rain. My body will get a bit of relief between showers or downpours but not enough to do any good.
First the flu hit our home a few weeks ago which I’m just getting over the chest congestion that was starting to concern me as I wheezed,I thought maybe bronchitis or pneumonia had set in especially with my body feeling over taxed from the three others pounding me too.
I’m trying to rest as much as possible,of course I do the normal activities of the homemaker though I’m not concerned with the little details as I am when I’m not in a flare. I may wash and dry a load of laundry one day and fold it the next then put them away on another day instead of doing it all in one day taxing my body even more. Thank God for an understanding husband who helps me through my ups and downs in seasons as this.
I’ve always been a perfectionist and when things are left undone I then become anxious because I needing everything to be picture perfect leaves me with anxiety,on the other handmy husband is teaching me there’s no need for perfection when in flares. His moto is who cares if this or that doesn’t get done, with the question;who is here that it makes such a difference that you need to stress over insignificant things such as the back porch didn’t get cleaned or the clothes didn’t get finished today.
Today is one of the I’m not doing much today,the day spent laying more in the heated bed watching tv or listening to sermons on the phone to build me spiritually and emotionally because in moments of flares,the constant pain can be very depressing so I’m doing all I can to be in God’s presence where my healing comes from.Though there is not physical healing as of yet ( I’m standing in faith for the manifestation for my physical healing) I certainly can find emotional healing during these seasons. This is where my faith,endurance,strength and my over all character is built so I do not complain of being on the potter’s wheel being molded and shaped as the Master plans.
In His timing
In His timing.. All will be for the purpose of glorifying the kingdom of God for He works all things out for our good and His glory.
If I’m not vigilant in staying in His presence I can easy fall into a manic/bipolar depression which adds insult to injury thus bringing on a lupus flare,so I refuse to have a pitty party giving satan the upper hand where he can create more devastation in my life. I’m praying and praising my way through with the help of prayer WARRIORS I’ve called upon. Some situations in life we need warriors to stand the gap in prayer,lowering us through the roof so to speak to get us to the Great Physician and healer Jesus Christ our Father God. Praise God for the Holy Spirit which is our comfort in our times of trials. The refuge from the storm,under the wings of the Almighty where I am safe and tended for,where I can find rest not only for my body but for my spirit also which can become over taxed too as I walk this journey in life.
With the changing of the seasons come rebirth,renewal,new growth and beauty for ashes not only in the natural but in the spiritual sense also.
As I look and see the bridal wreaths and wild plum trees in bloom I’m reminded of the changing of the seasons,soon the drabness of winter ( the time of nature’s rest) will let go of it’s grip with spring being closer than we imagine, a time where the world takes it’s turn in being “reborn” in new life,a refreshing time for the earth and man as nature comes alive once more bringing forth it’s beauty.
Winter drabness broken by the blooms of spring and my heart is blessed
It wasn’t until I read another blogger’s post on feeling overwhelmed by what got done and what needed to yet be done and she realizing the need for winter’s rest on the homesteaders perspective that I found myself having a moment of realization as she explained even nature itself knows that it must have time to rest so I have not been so hard on myself as I normally am when I’ve not completed my daily routine and project for after all it is winter and spring planting of the garden will soon be taking up it’s priority over this little craft or projects,as will regularly cleaning the coops and doing whatever is deemed necessary. So for now I’m enjoying the down time and resting as much as possible before the true work truly begins.